The well-known writer Pinglu has experienced cancer twice in half a year: lung cancer and breast cancer. Cancer, opened Pandora's box. But, she said frankly, "This is a gift." And she allowed her to think carefully about disease, fear, pain, thoughts, and affection, and wrote the book "Brief". She said: "The disease is not that sad, and it is not what you originally thought."
Pinglu has always considered herself a healthy person. Her physical strength is not bad, her diet is not bad, she almost never has insomnia, maintains proper exercise, and does not go to the hospital or check her body. However, at the end of 2018, due to work-related matters, it was found that lung leaves needed further inspection.
Unexpectedly, what awaited her was bad news. She got lung cancer.
After microinvention surgery, part of the lung leaf in the flat road was removed. She was originally good at body, and her recovery was in good condition. During the process, her life was as usual, and she went to climb hundreds of mountains and traveled abroad as usual. She said there were so many interesting things in this world, "I still go to movies and do things I like, there is no difference."
Later, she found pain in her right ribs, and under the advice of her home doctor, she had a breast examination and confirmed that it was breast cancer after the puncture. After suffering from cancer again within half a year, she smiled indifferently: "Skin is useless, I must face it."
She fell into the kingdom of disease and did not feel that she was "unfortunate". "That misfortune was often thought of, why isn't it the best gift?" At the same time, it is also a time to learn theology.
Will be in a straightforward way to fear the root cause
"I realized when I got cancer for the second time, I realized that my 'class' was not well learned." In the process of treating lung cancer, she opened a class with the topic of "Reading and Sitting/Sitting to Watch" and talked about 6 topics, but she was not "feared".
"It turns out that "fear" I haven't completely dealt with." At this time, the opportunity came, and she was able to see what her "fear" was? So, like an onion, it opens layer by layer, directly looking at the root of fear.
"After studying myself, I understand more and more clearly what I am afraid of? Maybe what I am afraid of is just fearing itself." She explained: "What I am afraid of is not the real thing, but the stereotype that I think cancer is very terrifying and extremely desperate."
Finally realized that life is endless
After all, most people hear cancer, it is like "death", and they plan the two to the best number. "What exactly is my fear of death? Should I leave? Leaving this lovely world? Is it a reluctance to my parents?" Pinglu said that when he understands what he is afraid of, he can face it calmly.
Through death, she realized that life is endless, "It is spring and autumn, and the leaves fall and grow again."
When she was sick, the role of her family was even more prominent!
There is a husband who loves her on the Pinglu. He is very careful to take care of her. She also learns how to look at close relationships from another perspective. "What I usually hear in my speech is the meaning of the surface. At this time, I will go and read it deeply. What does every sentence he says mean? I want to understand what he is. He also has a child inside and he is injured."
Enjoy the moments of being with his companion
Now she enjoys the moments of being with her companion and every cup of tea she drank. "I understand how wonderful it is to be here today, and it is so cherished."
During this period, a pair of daughters cared about her. "In a certain meaning, this is each other's lessons and learning, because life has ups and downs. No matter how much I love them or love them, my parents have no way to stay with them all the time."
"When they see their mother facing cancer during this period, their attitude and mood will also be a reference for them," said Ping Lu. "At least my son saw that I was not depressed one day during the whole process. He didn't think I was sad."
Want to break the wall of health and disease
In the friends, the flat road is a peaceful person. "I am not a person who is very good at expressing myself in words." Therefore, she hardly lets her friends know about her illness. She explained that it seemed that this happened suddenly at a friend's party, and it seemed that it was not appropriate. "I wouldn't want to shift that atmosphere; I'm not a person who can handle embarrassing situations."
When I was sick, Pinglu discovered that there were two kingdoms in the world: the kingdom of health and the kingdom of disease. When someone has cancer, people in the Health Kingdom will automatically put sick people on the side, "Will they go find why we are different? Is he eating something wrong and doing something wrong? But in reality, these two worlds should have been connected."
Who is good at expressing her ideas in words, she spent a year writing down what she thoughts during the illness, "I want to break the wall between the Kingdom of Health and the Kingdom of Disease through this book. In fact, there is really no difference." She also hopes that this book can accompany many people, "If he/she needs the company of the book."
●Original publication URL
●